You Are Human!
I’m sure you already know that you are human, but what does it mean to be human? In western society there is so much pressure to be and do everything all at once and if you start feeling overloaded or exhausted then it means that you just aren’t good enough. This pressure comes from every direction whether it be our peers, our family/relatives, our friends and our co-workers. It is easy to start to believe that you need to either push away your needs and feelings, or manage them in unknowingly harmful ways in order to just get by and look like everything is fine.
The truth is, none of us are fine all of the time. It’s okay to have a great Monday but really struggle mentally through Wednesday. It’s natural to sometimes feel sad or angry about unfair circumstances.
Emotions are natural.
Feeling intense emotions is natural.
I think so often we feel this pressure to constantly act like everything is great as a way of saving face and as a result a lot of things get swept under the rug and repressed. This repressing of emotions/circumstances doesn’t make everything great but rather creates a brand new problem within yourself. The more you try to suppress your emotions, the heavier your spirit becomes and life can feel that much more difficult to get through.
Here are some ways that you can work through your emotions without having your emotions break you down.
Talk to Someone You Trust
Talking to someone you trust can seem so overused but it is so helpful. When we feel bad about ourselves or just have frustrating emotions running through us, our instinct is to isolate ourselves. Talking through your emotions to someone you trust can not only help you get some baggage off your chest, but can also help you to see your situation through a different perspective when you talk it through out loud.
This is something that I have found sooo helpful in my own life. We all have moments where we feel like our lives are crumbling before our eyes and there is no place left to turn. I have felt this way so often and there are times where you can feel like your thoughts are bombarding you with the negative aspects of the things you can’t control. A gratitude journal can sound very vague so here is a format you can follow with some examples:
- Describe your circumstance as objectively as possible. Here’s another tip: make sure you describe the instance without your emotions first. DEscribe only what happened and then separately comment on your feelings. This can be difficult when you’re feeling hot but it’s so worth it!
- Ex: During _____ at work this took place. An individual at my workplace made a comment about ________ and this was not right because ________. After this instance I felt ______ and now I feel ______.
- Create a section to write 3 things that are positive or that you can do to make things positive from your situation. Literally bullet point it. If you struggle with getting that third one in, you’re not alone. But push through!
- I know that their comment doesn’t doesn’t define me and says more about their personality flaws than mine. I feel frustrated because I am a caring person.
- I can defuse the situation next time by saying “That’s not appropriate for the workplace”
- I won’t stoop to their level and start gossiping but will either have an open conversation or get advice from a coworker.
Identify Your Go-To Decompress
Learn to identify what calms your mind and makes the jumbled voices in your head become easier to manage. This could mean staying in the car a few extra minutes before going into your house to listen to music. It could mean taking a bath with your favorite scents to make your mind calm a bit. It could mean making dua and reading a little more of the Quran that day. This could also mean reaching out to Amala Helpline as a way of feeling connected anonymously.
There are many ways that we can decompress and we all have different ways of doing so. When we are in the middle of some messy emotions we can start to feel lost. Disconnecting for a second before returning to face and analyse these emotions can often be helpful!
You are not Alone and You are Human.
Allow yourself to have a moment to face messy emotions and know that there is nothing wrong with you for feeling.
Learn more about the importance decompresses and embracing the positive elements of our lives! Check out “Tips for Keeping a Gratitude Journal” by Jason March for Greater Good Magazine. Fine-tuning the virtue of gratefulness can help us manage our struggles in life in an effective way.
Thanks you for sharing your experiences with us. If anyone would like to share your stories (either sharing your name or anonymously) message us! Let’s give each other hope and show each other we are not alone!
“The day after I heard the news of my paternal grandfather passing away, my maternal grandfather gave a speech honoring my other grandfather. Not only was there a eulogy, but also support offered by relatives.
It felt nice to have my aunts, uncles, and cousins there to offer their support, as well as my maternal grandparents. I was only close to one of my uncles from my mom’s side and my aunt from my dad’s side. When it came to reaching out to the adults, I did reach out to one of them. I did appreciate the love and support that I received from everyone regardless. We all made dua together and I felt instant relief. I did notice that my dad’s sister was not present at our gathering. I was worried about her so I went to see her afterwards.
My aunt was crying heavily and I also felt her pain. I hugged her. That hug was meant to comfort her, but it also ended up comforting me.
I realized that I was not alone in my feelings of sadness.
I felt validated feeling this emotion.”
Give Amala Hopeline a Call on our free line! You are not alone!
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